iamfeelingsuperduperfreakingbloodyhorrendouslyfuckedupandstressed.
we'vegotareputationtoupholdwehavetowinwearestillnotthereyet.
tryingmybestnottoloseitinfrontofothersandimafraidicantholdonforlong.
went shopping with me and myself today. spent the whole day walking
aimlessly. from bugis to suntec to ... to cityhall to marina to tamp.
walked so much that my feet hurt like they are being pricked by needles.
and i didn want to stop walking. i wanted to see how far i can go without taking
a rest. wasnt really shopping. i was busy thinking, looking at the passers by.
thinking of what they might be thinking. enjoying myself as i walk alone without
being disturbed. especially like the feeling when im walking slowly in the crowd,
having nothing to worry about while the rest of the world seems to be in a mess -
some trying to push their way through to where they want to go to,
others talking loudly on their phones as though they are at home, and thinking
aloud where they want to get their new year clothes etcetc.
and there i was, watching all this shit and yet not involved. after all, im in
another mess yeah but thats not the point. loner? probably. but its not a crime
to take a walk by yourself right. escaping, mentally.
on a brighter note, i got my stickbag.