why is this happening to me? i jus dun get it all. its lik somebody throwing me off a cliff. n im falling. i noe im falling. the feeling is scary. reli scary. i noe im gonna fall flat somewhere. and have a horrendous ending. im crying out for help even though that i noe nobody will understand. nobody will come to my help. but im still screaming. im losing my voice. end of calling out for help coming soon. the last miserable hope of mine gone. thru my blurred teary eyes, this black hole appears. a big one. so big that its surrounding me and i cant see anymore. no lights no nothing. im struggling. trying to grab onto sth. sth that will at least accompany me as i fall. but there is nothing for me to hold on to . im about to give up. give up on everything. i cry. scream. shout. xie si di li. its a wu di dong i realise. i finally noe that its a feeling that will stay wif me. a terrible and torturing one.
e fight between me n it has started. im jus gonna keep this feeling within me. im not about to let it win. no. never...